130+ Funny Abs Puns, Jokes And One-Liners

Abs are not only a symbol of fitness but also a great source of amusement, especially when it comes to wordplay and humor. Who knew that a toned midsection could also be a rich vein of comedy? In this article, we’ll delve into a collection of 130 hilarious abs puns, jokes, and one-liners that are perfect for lightening up any conversation or workout session. 

Get ready to flex your humor muscles along with your abdominals!

Funny Abs Puns

  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field, and his abs were just straw-nominal!
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts for it, but boy, their abs are bone-rattling funny!
  • What do you call fake abs? Abominations!
  • I told my abs they could choose where to dine tonight. They picked somewhere core-gastronomical.
  • What did the mathematician say about his abs? I’ve got a six-pack of algorithms!
  • Why do abs hate cold weather? Because it makes them feel oblique.
  • Why did the abs go to school? To improve their corericulum.
  • Why do abs make great detectives? They always get to the core of the problem!
  • How do abs stay so sharp? They keep everything in pi-lates.
  • What’s an ab’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good bassline to keep those muscles popping.
  • Why don’t abs ever start a fight? They are all about peace and core-dial relations.
  • Why do abs never get lost? They always find the best navi-gut-ion tools.
  • What did one ab say to the other after a great workout? “That was ab-solutely crushing!”
  • Why are abs so secretive? They keep everything close to the vest.
  • What did the pirate say about his abs? Arrr, they’re a treasure!
  • Why are abs so religious? They believe in higher powers and lower crunches.
  • What does an ab wear to a formal event? A bow-tie on the upper quad.
  • Why don’t abs get along with thighs? They can’t stomach each other.
  • How do you describe elderly abs? As a retired six-pack, now a relaxed two-pack!
  • Why are abs always calm? They keep their cool, even under pressure.
  • What do abs drink at parties? Ab-sinthe, it’s totally core-holing!
  • Why did the abs sign up for a comedy class? They wanted to improve their punch-lines.
  • What did the abs do at the beach? They waved at everyone.
  • Why are abs so good at history? They remember everything from the Stone Age to the Iron Abs era.
  • What do you call an ab workout at a brewery? A beer gut battle.
  • Why are abs terrible liars? Every lie is a stretch!
  • How do you compliment someone’s abs in space? I love your meteor-core!
  • Why do abs love coffee? It keeps them perky and alert.
  • What’s an ab’s favorite chess piece? The rook, for its straight, strong lines.
  • Why did the abs join the military? They wanted to be part of the core-ps.
  • Why don’t abs get good cellphone reception? They’re always in airplane mode.
  • How do abs succeed in business? By sticking to a firm core-porate strategy.
  • Why are abs so eco-friendly? They always recycle their sweat.
  • What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
  • Why do abs hate fast food? It’s beneath their taste; they prefer a lean cuisine.
  • What do abs read before bed? Core-y bedtime stories.
  • Why did the abs go to the dance? They heard the twist was coming.
  • What’s an ab’s favorite horror movie? The Ab-normal Activity.
  • Why are stressed abs told to breathe? To relax their diaphragm and lighten up!
  • Why do abs love Thanksgiving? They’re always up for a little more stuffing.
Related Post:  90+ Funny Earth Day Puns, Jokes, and One-Liners

Funny Abs Jokes

  • Why did the abs cross the road? To crunch their way to the other side!
  • What do you get if you cross abs with an iPhone? An iCrunch!
  • How did the abs communicate in the old days? They used smoke-sign abs!
  • What does a bodybuilder’s abs do after a breakup? They break up into six-packs!
  • Why are abs always in charge of plans? They know how to keep things tight and organized.
  • What did the book about abs say? It was gripping; you could really feel the tension!
  • What’s an ab’s favorite kitchen appliance? The blender; it makes the best protein shakes!
  • Why do abs go to the library? To check out the abdominal volumes.
  • Why did the abs start a band? Because they had great core-dination!
  • How do you compliment a ghost’s abs? “Wow, that’s supernatural!”
  • What’s an ab’s least favorite movie? Gone with the Wind, it just blows them away.
  • What exercise do lazy abs do? Doughnut lifts.
  • What do you call an ab that acts in movies? A flextra!
  • Why did the abs call a meeting? To debrief and tighten up security.
  • What do you call an ab that doesn’t exist? Imaginary.
  • Why did the ab refuse to play cards? Because it was afraid of folding under pressure.
  • What do abs do when they are sad? They curl up into a fetal position.
  • What did the lazy abs say? “Can we take a break from crunch time?”
  • Why are abs like smart investors? They know all about dividends and growth.
  • What do you call a superhero with great abs? The Incredible Bulk.
  • Why did the abs go to a therapist? They felt torn.
  • What did the abs say after a long workout? “That was a stretch!”
  • Why don’t abs play poker? Too many belly bluffs.
  • What did the abs do when they got scared? They tightened up!
  • How do abs celebrate a victory? By popping a six-pack!
  • Why did the abs write a diary? To document their gut feelings.
  • What do you call a group of abs working together? A core-laboration.
  • What’s the favorite sport of abs? Belly-ball.
  • Why don’t abs use the elevator? They prefer to escalator their efforts.
  • What do you call an ab workout instructor who’s also a magician? David Copper-abs.
  • How do abs stay cool in the summer? Ice packs and chill.
  • What did the abs say to the lazy Sunday? Let’s roll out the yoga mats.
  • Why did the abs join the choir? They had perfect pitch and tone.
  • What’s an ab’s favorite TV show? “Gut Talent.”
  • What happens when abs get angry? They tighten up and let it rip!
  • Why are abs always happy on Friday? Because it’s finally the end of the weak!
  • What do you call a fish with great abs? A muscle fish.
  • Why don’t abs get hired for desk jobs? They can’t sit still for that long.
  • How do abs respond to a challenge? They rise up and face the crunch.
  • Why did the abs avoid the hot tub? They didn’t want to loosen up too much.
Related Post:  60+ Animal Puns: Jokes and One-Liners

Funny Abs Puns And One-Liners

  • If abs could speak, they’d probably say, “We’ve got this workout laced up!”
  • When abs go to the movies, they always book the seat with extra leg and core room.
  • Abs: Making sure your gut instincts are always tight.
  • If you think getting abs is hard, try punning with them; it’s a real workout!
  • A conversation between abs: “Feel the burn?” “No, I feel the earn!”
  • Never trust an atom or an ab; they make up literally everything!
  • Abs are like a good joke: They can crack you up.
  • “Do you have Wi-Fi?” “No, but I have a Wi-Fit!”
  • To the window, to the wall, until my abs drip down my balls!
  • Abs might be all about fitness, but their humor is as fit as it gets.
  • “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “Abs.” “Abs who?” “Exactly, let’s get working on them!”
  • Abs don’t use elevators because they’re always up for a challenge.
  • Why did the abs go to therapy? To resolve their inner conflicts.
  • “Your abs are so sharp, you could grate cheese on them!”
  • Abs: The only place where you’ll find muscles hiding under a six-pack.
  • Abs: Like onions, they bring tears to your eyes but are great in layers!
  • What’s the ab’s favorite day of the week? Tighten-up Tuesday.
  • When abs go shopping, they buy stock in crop tops.
  • Abs are like coffee: The perfect way to perk up your day!
  • “Abs are great and all, but can they help me with my math homework?” “Only if it’s division!”
  • Why do abs love clocks? Because it’s all about the timing!
  • If abs were a country, they’d be known for their tight borders.
  • Abs are like a good drama: full of twists and turns.
  • “You know, abs are like a good song—they hit the right notes and everybody listens.”
  • Why do abs hate jokes about them? Because they can’t stand being the butt of the joke!
  • Abs don’t just help you lift weights—they also lift spirits.
  • Why are abs always invited to parties? They bring the six-pack.
  • Abs are like the ocean: deep, mysterious, and always moving.
  • Why don’t abs use maps? Because they have an innate sense of di-rection.
  • “Look at those abs, are they real?” “No, they’re surreal!”
  • Abs may not solve your problems, but they will definitely distract you from them.
  • Abs: The ultimate proof that laughing can give you a six-pack.
  • Abs are like stars: they perform best under the spotlight.
  • Why do abs avoid spicy food? Because they can’t stomach the heat!
  • If abs had a motto, it would be: “No guts, no glory!”
  • “Do abs dream of electric sheep?” “No, but they dream of electric shears to trim the fat!”
  • Abs are the only muscles that can make you look forward to a belly laugh.
  • When it rains, abs don’t get wet; they do water workouts.
  • Abs are like good friends: always there when you need support.
  • “Did you hear about the ab that entered a talent show?” “Yeah, it stole the show with just a flex!”

Leave a Comment