170+ Funny Hand Puns And Jokes: High-Five Humor

Last updated on May 4th, 2024 at 03:12 pm

Your hands, those marvelous creations, are not just for high-fives and handshakes but also for delivering a hearty dose of humor. Get ready to experience a palmful of laughter as we explore 170+ funny hand puns and jokes.

From clever one-liners to Instagram-worthy captions, this collection will surely nail the art of hand-related humor.

Hand Puns and Jokes:

1. Why did the hand go to school? To improve its counting skills.
2. What did the left hand say to the right hand? “You’re in your right mind today!”
3. How do you catch a squirrel with just one hand? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
4. Why did the hand blush? It saw the other hand’s palm reading.
5. What do you call a hand that constantly misbehaves? Dis-fingered!
6. Why did the hand go to therapy? It had too many gripes.
7. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it with your hands!
8. What did the hand say to the face during a cold day? “Slap on some gloves!”
9. Why did the fingers break up? They needed some space.
10. What did one hand puppet say to the other? “I think we’re in the palm of their hand!”
11. How does a hand wave? By giving a handshake to the air!
12. Why did the hand get a job in construction? It was great at nailing things!
13. What do you call a hand that’s always late? Second-hand!
14. Why did the hand become a detective? It was excellent at fingerprinting.
15. What do you call a hand that plays the piano? Key-handed!
16. Why was the hand always a winner in card games? It had the best deal!
17. How do hands stay in touch? They send each other text messages!
18. What’s a hand’s favorite genre of music? Heavy metal!
19. Why are hands terrible at hiding? Because they always give themselves away!
20. How do you make a handkerchief dance? You put a little swing in it with your hands!
21. Why did the hand go to therapy? It had too many unresolved issues.
22. What did the hand say to the clock? “I’ll handle the minute hand!”
23. Why was the hand so good at math? It had finger counting down to a science!
24. What’s a hand’s favorite game? Rock, Paper, Scissors!
25. Why did the hand get an award? It was outstanding in its field!

Hand Puns for Your Instagram:

1. “Nailing life one pun at a time! #HandyHumor”
2. “Feeling hands-on with these puns! ✋ #PalmistryLaughs”
3. “Giving you a handpicked selection of laughter! 🤚 #HandJokes”
4. “Palm-azing puns for your feed! 🌴 #HandyHumor”
5. “Throwing a high-five to humor! 🖐️ #HandPuns”
6. “Feeling finger-lickin’ good with these hand puns! 👍 #FingerLaughs”
7. “Nail the day with a dose of hand-related humor! 💅 #HandJokes”
8. “Palm before the storm of laughter! 🌪️ #HandPuns”
9. “High-fiving my way through life with these puns! 🙌 #HighFiveHumor”
10. “These hand puns are grippingly good! 🤝 #GripLaughs”
11. “Hold on tight to these hand puns! 🤲 #HoldOnLaughs”
12. “Thumbs up for hand-related humor! 👍 #ThumbsUpLaughs”
13. “Giving you a hand in finding the funniest puns! ✋ #PalmAssistance”
14. “Palm Sunday? More like Palm Punday! 🌴 #PundayFunday”
15. “Raising a hand for laughter! 🙋‍♀️ #HandyJokes”
16. “These puns have a strong grip on humor! 💪 #GripLaughs”
17. “Double tap for a double high-five of laughter! 🖐️✋ #HighFiveHumor”
18. “Let’s nail the day with some hand puns! 💅 #NailLaughs”
19. “Feeling hand-in-glove with these puns! 🤚🧤 #HandyLaughs”
20. “Thumbs up if you’re ready for some hand humor! 👍 #ThumbsUpLaughs”
21. “Hold on to your hats, it’s pun time! 🎩 #HoldOnLaughs”
22. “Palm Sunday, but make it punny! 🌴 #PalmPunday”
23. “These puns are a real hand-ful! 🤲 #HandfulLaughs”
24. “High-five for humor! 🖐️ #HighFiveHumor”
25. “Nailing the art of hand-related puns! 💅 #NailLaughs”

Read More: Funny Knee Puns And Jokes: Knee-deep in Humor

Hand Puns Captions:

1. “When life gives you lemons, give it a high-five! 🍋 #HandyHumor”
2. “Raising my hand because these puns deserve applause! 🙋‍♂️👏 #ApplauseLaughs”
3. “High-fiving my way through Monday blues! 🖐️ #MondayMotivation”
4. “Glove me some good hand puns! 🧤 #HandyLaughs”
5. “Hold on tight; these puns are about to make you laugh! 🤲 #HoldOnLaughs”
6. “Finger-lickin’ good puns for a fantastic day! 👍 #FingerLaughs”
7. “Thumbs up for a hand-tastic day! 👍 #ThumbsUpLaughs”
8. “Ready to palm-inate your feed with hand puns! 🌴 #PalmPuns”
9. “Feeling hand-in-hand with laughter! 🤝 #HandyJokes”
10. “These puns have a strong grip on my sense of humor! 💪 #GripLaughs”
11. “Hold my hand and let’s dive into a sea of puns! 🤚🌊 #SeaOfLaughs”
12. “Two hands clapping for the punniest jokes! 👏✋ #ClapLaughs”
13. “Keep calm and high-five on! 🖐️ #HighFiveHumor”
14. “Palm-azing puns to spice up your day! 🌶️ #HandyLaughs”
15. “Hold on, let me check my palm—yep, these puns are hilarious! 🤲 #HoldOnLaughs”
16. “Giving you a hand in finding the humor in every situation! 🤚 #HandyLaughs”
17. “Grippingly good puns for a thumbs-up kind of day! 👍 #ThumbsUpLaughs”
18. “Thumbs up if you’re ready for a hand-tastic time! 👍 #ThumbsUpLaughs”
19. “High-five for making it through the week! 🖐️ #WeekendVibes”
20. “Feeling hand-in-glove with these puns! 🤚🧤 #HandyLaughs”
21. “Palm Sunday or Punday Funday? Why not both! 🌴🌟 #PundayFunday”
22. “Hold on to your hats; it’s pun time! 🎩 #HoldOnLaughs”
23. “Ready to nail the day with some hand puns! 💅 #NailLaughs”
24. “Thumbs up if you’re ready to embrace the hand humor! 👍 #ThumbsUpLaughs”
25. “Palm-inate your day with laughter! 🌴🤣 #HandyLaughs”

Hand One-Liners:

1. Why did the hand apply for a job? It wanted to lend a helping hand.
2. How do hands communicate? They have a palmversation!
3. What do you call a hand that’s always ready to party? A palm tree!
4. Why did the hand bring a ladder to the bar? It heard the drinks were on the house!
5. How do hands stay warm in winter? They put on their mittens!
6. What did one hand say to the other during a game of hide-and-seek? “You’re in hand-sight!”
7. Why did the hand get promoted? It had a firm handshake on the job.
8. How do you make a handkerchief dance? You put a little swing in it with your hands!
9. What did the left hand say to the right hand during a disagreement? “Let’s grip this out!”
10. Why did the hand break up with the clock? It couldn’t handle the second hand always moving.
11. How do you catch a squirrel with just one hand? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
12. Why did the hand blush? It saw the other hand’s palm reading.
13. What do you call a hand that constantly misbehaves? Dis-fingered!
14. Why did the hand become a detective? It was excellent at fingerprinting.
15. What’s a hand’s favorite genre of music? Heavy metal!
16. How do hands stay in touch? They send each other text messages!
17. Why are hands terrible at hiding? Because they always give themselves away!
18. Why did the hand get an award? It was outstanding in its field!
19. What’s a hand’s favorite game? Rock, Paper, Scissors!
20. Why did the hand go to therapy? It had too many unresolved issues.
21. What did the hand say to the clock? “I’ll handle the minute hand!”
22. What’s a hand’s favorite position in a company? Hand of the CEO!
23. Why did the hand become a chef? It was great at whisking things up!
24. How do hands play hide and seek? They try to stay hand-in-hand!
25. Why did the hand join a band? It had the perfect sense of rhythm!

Broken Hand Jokes:

1. Why did the broken hand go to therapy? It needed some mending.
2. What did the doctor say to the broken hand? “You’re in for a handy recovery!”
3. How do you fix a broken hand? With some handy work!
4. Why did the broken hand feel left out? It couldn’t grasp the situation.
5. What do you call a hand that’s been injured? Under-handed!
6. How does a broken hand greet people? With a wave of pain!
7. Why did the broken hand go to the beach? It wanted some shore support!
8. What did the cast say to the broken hand? “I’ve got you covered!”
9. How does a broken hand count? It goes, “One ouch, two ouch, three ouch…”
10. Why did the broken hand refuse to play cards? It was afraid of a bad deal.
11. What’s a broken hand’s least favorite season? Fall, because it involves too many leaves!
12. How does a broken hand answer the phone? With a crackling voice!
13. Why did the broken hand take up painting? It wanted to brush up on its skills.
14. What did the broken hand say to the hammer? “You’ve really nailed it this time!”
15. How does a broken hand type? Painstakingly!
16. Why did the broken hand become a comedian? It wanted to give everyone a good crack-up!
17. What did the cast say to the broken hand at the party? “You’re really hanging loose!”
18. Why did the broken hand avoid the art museum? It couldn’t handle the drawings!
19. How does a broken hand navigate a maze? With a lot of twists and turns!
20. Why did the broken hand become a chef? It needed to learn how to handle a cracked egg.
21. What’s a broken hand’s favorite movie genre? Drama, of course!
22. How does a broken hand dance? With a lot of limp-wristed moves!
23. Why did the broken hand refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to be the wrist of the group.
24. What did the broken hand say when it healed? “I’m back in hand-tion!”
25. Why did the broken hand get a job at the bakery? It was great at hand-ling dough!

Missing Hand Puns:

1. Why did the missing hand join a theater group? It wanted a starring role!
2. What did the clock say to the missing hand? “You’re minutesting from the hour!”
3. How does a missing hand play hide and seek? It’s always out of reach!
4. Why did the missing hand become a detective? It was good at solving cold cases!
5. What did the missing hand say to the glove? “You’ve got the upper hand here!”
6. How does a missing hand catch a ball? It’s a hands-free approach!
7. Why did the missing hand go to the party? It wanted to be the center of attention!
8. What’s a missing hand’s favorite song? “Hands Up” by Lloyd Banks!
9. How does a missing hand high-five? It’s a bit of a low-five situation!
10. Why did the missinghand feel lonely? It was always left with a sense of loss.
11. What did the missing hand say during a game of cards? “I’m all in, even if I’m missing a hand!”
12. How does a missing hand play a musical instrument? It becomes a one-handed band!
13. Why did the missing hand avoid the handshake? It didn’t want to feel left out.
14. How did the missing hand console itself? It gave itself a virtual pat on the back.
15. Why did the missing hand become a writer? It had a talent for penning gripping stories.
16. What did the missing hand say when it found a glove? “This is the perfect fit!”
17. How does a missing hand take a selfie? With a bit of thumb magic!
18. Why did the missing hand start a podcast? It had a unique perspective on hands-on experiences.
19. What’s a missing hand’s favorite game show? Wheel of Fortune – it’s all about spinning!
20. Why did the missing hand become a chef? It mastered the art of single-handed cooking.
21. How did the missing hand catch a cab? It hailed it with a bit of wrist action!
22. Why did the missing hand become a detective? It had a knack for sleuthing out mysteries.
23. How does a missing hand type on a keyboard? With a hunt-and-peck strategy!
24. What did the missing hand say during a game of charades?
25. Why did the missing hand become a gardener? It had a green thumb, or in its case, a green finger!

Dry Hand Jokes:

1. Why did the hand bring a towel to the desert? It wanted to dry humor.
2. How do you make a handkerchief laugh? You tickle it with your dry wit!
3. What did the hand say to the lotion? “You’re my moisturizing hero!”
4. How do you keep your hands from getting dry? Give them a high-five!
5. Why did the hand refuse to go swimming? It didn’t want to become a prune.
6. How did the hand respond to the desert heat? It became a palm tree for some shade!
7. Why did the hand bring sunscreen to the Arctic? It wanted to be cool and protected.
8. What did the hand say during a drought? “I’m feeling a bit parched!”
9. How does a hand stay dry in the rain? By staying under cover!
10. Why did the hand get a job at the bakery? It loved working with flour.
11. What did the hand say after applying hand cream? “I’m feeling smooth as butter!”
12. How do you turn a desert into a beach? Add a little sand to your hands!
13. Why did the hand become a comedian? It had a talent for dry humor!
14. How do you make a hand laugh? With a good dose of dry wit!
15. Why did the hand apply for a job at the laundry? It loved to dry things out.
16. What did the hand say to the paper towel? “You’re my drying mate!”
17. How do you stop a hand from sweating? Give it a good air-dry!
18. Why did the hand bring a fan to the beach? It wanted to stay breezy!
19. How does a hand stay cool in the summer? By finding some hand shade!
20. What did the hand say to the heatwave? “You’re a real dry spell!”
21. How does a hand feel after a workout? Dry-fit and ready for more!
22. Why did the hand join a book club? It loved a good page-turner to keep it dry.
23. What did the hand say after a day in the sun? “I’m a bit sun-dried but happy!”
24. How does a hand stay cool during a heatwave? It finds some palm trees for shade!
25. Why did the hand bring a cactus to the office? It wanted some dry humor!

Conclusion:

In this hand-tastic journey through 170+ funny hand puns and jokes, we’ve explored the myriad ways our hands can bring joy and laughter to our lives. From high-fives to handshakes, from dry humor to missing hand puns, each category added its unique touch to this collection.

Highlights:

31. These hand puns have a firm grip on humor, keeping you entertained.
32. Whether it’s a high-five or a handshake, these puns know how to make an impact.
33. Missing a hand? These puns are here to lend a helping hand of laughter.
34. Dry humor, like a good moisturizer, keeps your spirits smooth and happy.
35. Broken hand? These jokes offer a dose of humor that’s both comforting and healing.

So, let’s give a round of applause to the versatility of our hands and the endless laughter they can bring. Keep these puns handy for any occasion, and may your days be filled with high-fives, hearty laughter, and a touch of palmistry fun!