150 + Bagel Puns and Jokes: A Hole New Level of Fun

Last updated on May 15th, 2024 at 11:20 am

Bagels, those delightful circular treats, have not only become a staple in many breakfast menus but also a source of endless amusement. Who would have thought that a simple ring of dough could inspire so much humor? In this article, we embark on a journey through 160 bagel puns and jokes that will take your sense of humor to a whole new level. 

Whether you’re a bagel enthusiast or just in need of a good laugh, this collection is bound to leave you rolling on the floor – or perhaps, rolling in dough!

80 Funny Bagel Puns and Jokes

1. Why did the bagel go to therapy? It had too many emotional holes.
2. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of music? Poppy seed!
3. Did you hear about the bagel who won the lottery? It was on a roll!
4. How do you organize a fantastic bagel party? Invite everyone – it’s a hole in one celebration!
5. Why did the bagel cross the road? To get to the cream cheese on the other side.
6. What did the bagel say to the bread? You’re just a loaf-er!
7. Why did the bagel get an award? It was outstanding in its field!
8. How do you compliment a bagel? You’re the everything I’ve ever wanted!
9. What did the bagel say to its friend? You’re a real “dough-mestic” diva!
10. Why did the bagel break up with the croissant? It was tired of all the flaky behavior.
11. How does a bagel answer the phone? “Ahoy Bagel!”
12. What’s a bagel’s favorite exercise? The breadlift.
13. Why do bagels make terrible detectives? They always get a little toasted during interrogations.
14. What’s a bagel’s favorite dance move? The twist and dough.
15. Why are bagels so good at baseball? They have a great swing!
16. How do you compliment a bagel chef? You’re a dough-some cook!
17. What do you call a bagel that can fly? A plain bagelicopter.
18. Why did the bagel go to space? It wanted to see if there was life on other rolls.
19. What’s a bagel’s favorite movie genre? Roll-ercoaster dramas.
20. How does a bagel apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I caused a hole lot of trouble.”
21. Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a well-rounded individual.
22. What’s a bagel’s favorite social media platform? Loafstagram.
23. Why are bagels so calm? They take everything with a grain of salt.
24. What’s a bagel’s favorite game? Doughnut disturb, I’m playing.
25. How does a bagel stay in shape? It does lots of roll-ups.
26. Why did the bagel bring a ladder to the bakery? It wanted to reach the upper crust.
27. What do you call a bagel that can sing? A tuneful.
28. How do you fix a broken bagel? With cream cheese-it.
29. Why did the bagel get promoted? It rose to the occasion.
30. What’s a bagel’s favorite sport? Rollerblading.
31. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit crumby.
32. How do you describe a bagel in winter? Chilled dough.
33. What did the bagel say to the butter? “You’re on a roll!”
34. Why are bagels so good at math? They know how to divide and conquer.
35. What’s a bagel’s favorite TV show? Breaking Bread.
36. Why did the bagel start a band? It wanted to make some dough.
37. What’s a bagel’s favorite holiday? Doughnut Day.
38. How does a bagel end a relationship? It says, “We’re toast.”
39. Why did the bagel apply for a job at the bakery? It wanted to earn some dough.
40. What’s a bagel’s favorite board game? Monopoly – because it’s all about the dough.
41. Why did the bagel go to the gym? It wanted to work on its gluten-free.
42. How does a bagel cheer for its favorite team? It says, “Go, go, go! Roll them over!”
43. What’s a bagel’s favorite car? A Rolls-Royce.
44. Why did the bagel go to the party solo? It wanted to be the life of the party.
45. How does a bagel apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I acted a bit crispy.”
46. What’s a bagel’s favorite subject in school? Roll-gebra.
47. Why did the bagel become a comedian? It had a dough-lightful sense of humor.
48. How does a bagel play hide and seek? It finds the perfect nook and cranny.
49. What’s a bagel’s favorite movie snack? Doughnuts.
50. Why did the bagel file a police report? It was the victim of a crust.
51. How does a bagel get a job? It has a bagel-icious resume.
52. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of art? Roll-igraphy.
53. Why did the bagel go to the beach? It wanted to work on its tan lines.
54. How does a bagel make decisions? It goes with its gut feeling.
55. What’s a bagel’s favorite exercise? The carb curl.
56. Why did the bagel get a ticket? It was caught loitering.
57. How does a bagel keep in touch with friends? Through bagel mail.
58. What’s a bagel’s favorite Shakespeare play? Much Ado About Nothing (with cream cheese).
59. Why did the bagel join a band? It wanted to be a rock ‘n’ roll star.
60. How does a bagel propose? With a dough-mond ring.
61. What’s a bagel’s favorite book genre? Rolling mysteries.
62. Why did the bagel go to space? It wanted to be the first doughnut in orbit.
63. How does a bagel apologize? It offers a piece of bread.
64. What’s a bagel’s favorite game show? The Wheel of Fortune – because it’s always on a roll.
65. Why did the bagel get a job as a chef? It wanted to show off its culinary skills.
66. How does a bagel relax? It takes a breadcation.
67. What’s a bagel’s favorite superhero? The Incredible Edible Bagel.
68. Why did the bagel become a detective? It had a keen eye for crimes against carbs.
69. How does a bagel handle stress? It takes a few deep breaths.
70. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of humor? Punny business.
71. Why did the bagel start a band? It wanted to make some dough-re-mi.
72. How does a bagel express excitement? It says, “I’m on a roll!”
73. What’s a bagel’s favorite dance style? The baker’s twirl.
74. Why did the bagel go on a diet? It wanted to be a hole lot lighter.
75. How does a bagel exercise patience? It practices dough-lay meditation.
76. What’s a bagel’s favorite love song? “I knead you now.”
77. Why did the bagel refuse to fight? It was against using flour power.
78. How does a bagel handle rejection? It says, “That’s the way the cookie crumbles.”
79. What’s a bagel’s favorite Olympic sport? The dough-cathlon.
80. Why did the bagel become a motivational speaker? It knew how to rise to the occasion.

Read More: Funny Peanut Puns And Jokes: Laughing with a Crunch

80 Bagel Puns for Instagram Captions

1. Rolling into the day with a bagel in hand – it’s a dough-lightful morning!
2. My bagel brings all the boys to the yard. 🎶
3. Life is better with a bagel – it’s the yeast I can do!
4. When in doubt, bagel it out!
5. Sunday mornings are for bagels and contemplation.
6. Bagels: Because adulting is hard, and carbs make it better.
7. Just a girl living in a bagel world.
8. Rise and shine, it’s bagel time!
9. Bagels: the real breakfast of champions.
10. Keep calm and put a bagel in the toaster.
11. Feeling crispy today!
12. Bagel in one hand, confidence in the other.
13. Today’s forecast: 100% chance of bagels.
14. On a roll and loving it!
15. Bagels: the ultimate comfort food.
16. Doughnut worry, be happy!
17. Bagel mornings are the best mornings.
18. Bagel mode: activated.
19. Living my best carb life.
20. Bagels make the world go ’round.
21. The early bird gets the bagel.
22. Bagels and good vibes only.
23. Bagel lover for life.
24. Toasting to a bagelicious day!
25. Savoring every bite of bagel goodness.
26. Bagels speak louder than words.
27. Bagel queen in a world of toast.
28. Bagel enthusiast and proud of it.
29. In a serious relationship with bagels.
30. Bagels: because adulting is overrated.
31. Embracing my inner bagel lover.
32. Bagel brunch = best brunch.
33. Bagels are my love language.
34. Bagel mornings are the best mornings.
35. Bagel vibes only.
36. Carbs, coffee, bagels – my holy trinity.
37. Bagel goals: always toasted, never roasted.
38. Bagels make everything better.
39. Bagel life is the best life.
40. Sunday, sunshine, and bagels.
41. Bagel enthusiast by day, dreamer by night.
42. Bagel lover and proud of it.
43. Bagel mornings are magic mornings.
44. More bagels, less problems.
45. Bagels: the key to my heart.
46. Rise and shine with a side of bagel.
47. Bagels: my one true love.
48. Bagel mode: always on.
49. A bagel a day keeps the grumpy away.
50. Bagel bliss and coffee kisses.
51. Life is short, eat more bagels.
52. Bagels: the cure for everything.
53. Bagel mornings = best mornings.
54. Toasting to a bagelicious day!
55. Bagels are the answer, no matter the question.
56. Bagels: because adulting is hard.
57. Bagels speak louder than words.
58. Bagel brunch = best brunch.
59. Bagel queen in a world of toast.
60. Bagel enthusiast and proud of it.
61. In a serious relationship with bagels.
62. Bagels: because adulting is overrated.
63. Embracing my inner bagel lover.
64. Bagel mornings are the best mornings.
65. Bagel vibes only.
66. Carbs, coffee, bagels – my holy trinity.
67. Bagel goals: always toasted, never roasted.
68. Bagels make everything better.
69. Bagel life is the best life.
70. Sunday, sunshine, and bagels.
71. Bagel enthusiast by day, dreamer by night.
72. Bagel lover and proud of it.
73. Bagel mornings are magic mornings.
74. More bagels, less problems.
75. Bagels: the key to my heart.
76. Rise and shine with a side of bagel.
77. Bagels: my one true love.
78. Bagel mode: always on.
79. A bagel a day keeps the grumpy away.
80. Bagel bliss and coffee kisses.

Conclusion

In the grand scheme of humor, bagels have proven to be more than just a delightful breakfast option—they’re a source of endless amusement. From the classic “hole in one” celebration to the emotionally hole-ridden bagel seeking therapy, the world of bagel puns and jokes is as diverse as the toppings on a freshly baked bagel.

As we wrap up our journey through 160 bagel puns and jokes, it’s evident that the English language can be as versatile as the bagel itself. From witty wordplay to clever quips, each pun and joke adds a layer of levity to our daily lives. 

So, the next time you’re enjoying a bagel, remember these laughs and share them with your friends to spread the joy.